Dying to Live or Learning to Die

(Sorry, I couldn’t make up my mind)

I might be around for quite a few years,

So don’t shed any tears,

Oh, for goodness sake,

Give me an Irish wake,

Or bake a large cake,

I’ve been dying since the moment I was born,

A finite length somewhere in eternity,

Not that anyone said that to me,

But I knew life was limited like a blade of grass,

When my time was up I expected to pass,

I didn’t want to close my mind,

Facing death is but a challenge to find,

The other side, without the fear,

Of leaving here,

I was taken from my mother’s womb,

Uncomfortable there with little room,

To grow, and do you know,

I’m being crowded again,

With my limitations and eager to emerge,

Into a new world, I’m on the verge

 I’m ready to face, or even embrace,

Death when it comes for me,

Like going to sleep and awakening in another place,

But for now I want to live every minute of every day,

Not worrying about the ifs and whens,

Ready to confront death with a grin,

Not fearful at all, knowing it will happen,

 Sooner or later, maybe not today,

And it might not be my way

I might want to take a snooze or die on a cruise,

Take medicines to keep me sane,

Or just sit back and let my life wane,

You can help me by showing love and support,

Take out the trash,  give me a glass of port,

I don’t need to see you cry, or to know why,

You think you’re going to miss me,

My passing will set you free,

 I don’t want to take care of you,

I’ve got enough to do,

Keeping death from snuffing my wick,

Hey! Remember I’m the one who is sick!

I have faith that there is life after death,

I have my hope, and that helps me cope,

I’d like to see you there too,

Not just another molecule,

Returning back to dust,

But if you must, you must,

How much time do I have really?

I enjoy life, but how time flew,

I was ready to give life up long ago for you,

But I didn’t have to,

I’ve lived a full life, faced a little strife,

And discovered much about me,

But don’t you see, that’s vanity,

I want to have a normal day, the best,

Go home and get some rest,

Get my life in order, no unfinished business,

No unsettled mess,

I don’t intend to leave you all alone,

I’ll be watching, helping you atone,

All the times you thought I wasn’t a great friend,

I want you to know I was the best I’ve been,

And whatever you say or do, remember I loved you,

Play some music on my last days,

Or read me a book about how to mend my ways,

Tell lies about telling the truth,

Laugh and share things with Ruth,

Wait a minute! I don’t know any Ruth, that’s the truth,

Tell me funny stories or remind me of stories I still need to write,

But I’m afraid that would keep me up throughout the night,

I can see me now, waiting with my laptop in bed,

Wanting you to remember the last words I said,

It’s hard to type with these clumsy fingers of mine,

“They’re coming for me, it’s about time,

I’m waiting in line,

Oops! I’m out of time.  Don’t forget to write!

Call me sometime!

Okay! I’m going already.

Uh, could I tell one more story or write a poem?”

Written in response to my own thoughts about death and dying, knowing that I don’t know what tomorrow might bring, should tomorrow even come. I’ve tasted hell a few times here on earth, and decided I don’t want the full menu. I tell people that every day above ground is a good day and I say, “Thank God, I’m alive!”  I’m reminded daily of all the good things here and better things yet to come.  When you get to the pearly gates, I want to be there to greet you with a smile and say, “I’m glad you made it. There’s a place reserved for you.  Take off your shoes and stay awhile.  Don’t worry about the weather.  It won’t get too hot or too cold and Hell storms never make it up the hill.”